Hello, everyone! Hope you've had a happy holiday and a wonderful New Year's Eve. It's still holiday season in PR (what with Three Kings' Day going on tomorrow), so the tree is still up, presents are still hidden, and we're still trying to make the dog stop eating the ornaments. Thanks for sticking with me through the hiatus!
As you guys know, the end of 2010 was bittersweet to me. While I had some good times in 2010 (finishing & defending thesis, graduating, seeing my friends Gloria & Zeynep, Damián moving in), in December I lost two people unexpectedly: an old friend and my grandma. To say that it was sudden and shocking is an understatement; for the most part I am still reeling. I'm still confused and I still don't understand, but for the most part, I am being eaten alive by feelings of guilt and regret. Not spending enough time with these people. Not telling them how much I cared. And so forth.
Friends who have been through similar situations tell me that there's nothing I can do and that, somehow, they knew. And if they didn't, they understand now. While I keep trying to tell myself that, it's just difficult. It hurts. So now, I want to avoid this feeling. I want to tell the people I love how much I love them and care about them, so they know everyday that they're an important part of my life. Sad, to only engage in this after all these things have happened.
Sorry if I seem like a Debbie Downer, and to all those who are having wonderful starts in 2011, don't get down on my account! Stay strong and blaze through 2011 like the star that you are, dangit!
I will (hopefully) be returning to blogging on a regular basis soon. I have some leftover posts from this last December that I never got around to putting up (due to the sudden deaths of my old friend and grandmother). I will probably work my way through those and then provide you with brand new content. And, of course, my New Year's resolutions. Because what's a New Year without a resolution to feel tempted to break? :)
Stay safe everyone. Much love to all!